A Simply Darr-ling Mom of the Month!
Here at me4kidz we're highlighting one mom every month that inspires. For August we're proud to announce Kendra Darr from Simply Darrling as that momma!
Kendra and her husband Brad have been through quite the journey over the last several years. The journey of adoption.
The two met and began dating in 2003 while Kendra was a senior in high school and married three years later. Because the two got married young they decided it would be best to wait 5-7 years before having any kids.
Nine years later they started the process of adoption and four years after that they were blessed with the arrival of Baby Emmett!
In this post we talked with Kendra about adoption to give some insight into the process, what people can expect and share what Kendra and Brad wished they'd have known at the beginning.
What to Expect When Adopting
Starting off, don't settle for the first agency you see. Kendra said that some agencies didn't align with their values and it took several tries to find the perfect fit.
The start of the adoption process is the home study and paperwork. A lot of paperwork. "Making a list of what had been completed and what was still left was super helpful. My house was nearly spotless for the initial home study (it was a lot more realistic of how we live for the updates)."
Next you'll work on the birth mom letter and family profile book. Kendra tells us "it was helpful to see examples from other families in the pool for inspiration. Fortunately, we had a lot of pictures from our vacations so it was easy to get pictures for our book; however, we did need a few more pictures showing our everyday life."
For the first year, Kendra says to "expect everybody to ask questions about where you are in the process and when you're going to have a baby (like you have some sort of magic wand to make it happen). Once we got into the pool, I was really good at simply saying we were waiting to be chosen by a birth family and that there wasn't any other update."
As the years went by Kendra mentioned that one of her biggest fears was that it simply wouldn't happen for them. She stresses that it's important to not put your life on hold. "Take the big vacation, move to the new neighborhood, make plans with friends for the weekends. I wish we had traveled more in the past 4 years. We traveled domestically about once a year because it was a "safe" trip if we had to cancel, and only took a couple big trips".
When Kendra and Brad got the call about Emmett they were 4 days from leaving the current agency. Now, after a whirlwind of joy, Emmett is almost two months old and the family of three couldn't be happier.
Adoption is not a quick process by any means but Kendra and Brad are proof that perseverance pays off.
- Brooke Pakulski